Month three, or is it four? Self-refection with SWOT Analysis

I managed to get myself back on track, slightly, during March with my self-refection efforts. Then I wound up sick for the first two weeks of April--cold and flu stuff, but still, it's sucked. I'm rarely sick enough to warrant my taking time off work, but I had to take a day off from both my jobs. Yuck. Anyway, my being sick derailed my efforts to complete my review of March's efforts to consider my life.

For March I opted to use SWOT (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats) Analysis. I realize this is a method for businesses to make decisions, but I thought the different way of looking at my problem might be useful.

Strengths:
Strengths, Experiences, What makes you unique

• Creative*--I'm a writer, reasonably artistic, a half-decent eye for what looks 'good.'
• Reliable--I almost never miss a day (the last week excepted), never show up late.
• Independent worker--I don't need constant reminders, or a hovering supervisor to get my work done.
• Researcher and librarian--10+ year experience in academic research, with involvement in various stages and various roles of the research.
• Small group fitness instructor--2 years experience in teaching aerial circus skills, speaking in front of small groups, class management.
• Baker and cook--need baked goods?
• Seamstress

After some discussion, Andrew told me that: "You are very good at doing whatever it is you need to do for the job in front of you."

I'm not quite sure how to sum that up, maybe: Gets Shit Done?

*I always say I'm creative, but what does this mean, really? How much of a strength is this? Why do I always think of myself as creative? I'm beginning to wonder.

Weaknesses:
Areas for improvement, resources needed, education required

• Initiative--This may seem kinda of weird. I'm really good at doing tasks assigned to me and completing them on time. What I'm not so great at is, when I'm told something general needs to be done about this huge thing, figuring out what I should do about it, or where I should start. Being presented with an overarching or generic problem with no specific requests on how to fix it stresses me out.
• Timid/Conflict Adverse--I almost always prefer to handle things via email if I can. Please don't get in my face.
• Jealous--I constantly struggle with feelings of jealousy, especially when I see someone have an awesome opportunity open up to themselves, to which I have no share (but wish I could).
• Insecure/Lack of Confidence--Seriously, my head is a mess.
• No business sense--Hence why my self-published novels have sold very little.
• No specific goals--I tend to think in generalizations...

Here's a thing I learned from doing SWOT: I've always been a dreamer. I've spent a lot of car and bus trips daydreaming. I used to spend a lot of boring nights as a child and teenager wishing something random and amazing would happen to me, at my house in the countryside.

Dreaming doesn't translate into success. At least not directly.

I have dreamed of being a writer for about at long as I can remember. I have three full novels sitting on Amazon Kindle doing only slightly less than nothing. I have failed to do anything about this. I haven't learned how to market myself. I haven't learned how to make a better cover for my novels to make them more attractive. I haven't learned how to use a Kindle marketing campaign. I haven't even stood on street corners handing out flyers for my books.

(I have, in fact, spent years sending my first to novels [Cimwai's Bay and The Cure] to agents and publishers, to mostly no avail.)

If I choose to take the artist's route for the rest of my life, I have to learn how to do this. Yes, I love to write, it makes me feel good when I've completed a (in my opinion) particularly delectable scene. HOWEVER. I would also like to make a small sum from my efforts.

I have to take initiative to make my dreams come true.

Ciao,

Andrea

P.S. I'll finish the last 2 points of my SWOT Analysis next time...this post got long.

Photography by Alexa Baker--because she is awesome and makes me look awesome.

Caring for the academic in your life

The title of this post makes it sound like having an academic in your life is like having a pet, or a tank of sea monkeys. I promise, that even a challenging kitten like ours (who's always had a lively personality to say the least), is still easier than coping with, encouraging, and supporting someone looking for a profession in academia. I got the idea of putting together this post after having coffee with an acquaintance who also moved to the Boston area thanks to her spouse (he's only starting his PhD, so I found myself in the advice giving/experienced position).

A semi-recent PhD comic gives an not-so-inaccurate look into the life of the partner/spouse of an academic:

Andrew was still home when I read this comic (I think he was getting ready to leave), so I informed him that I was his academic groupie...which of course lead to some inappropriate conversation about whether or not I'd been living up to my "groupie duties."

Anyway...Andrew and I moved to Edmonton in order for him to complete his Masters (and then we stayed for his PhD), and we're now in Somerville for his post-doctoral research. Although we didn't make either of these moves without consultation, we probably wouldn't have lived in either place if it wasn't for him. As Andrew looks for a full-time job we're expecting to move once more, but again, it won't be without mutual agreement. I don't generally travel with Andrew when he goes to conferences as I usually have to work/I know I won't see him if I do come, but I've been left at home with the kitten on numerous occasions.

So, how does one care for the academic in your life? Well, to start, not unlike a pet, you make sure they have food, water, and shelter. I often joke that if Andrew and I weren't married, he'd be eating ramen noodles for most meals, and finding himself doing the "sniff test" every morning to help him figure what to wear. This isn't to say that Andrew's incapable of cooking or doing laundry, but he'd got experiments, analyses, papers, meetings, etc., that tend to take priority. He's not the "Absent Minded Professor" either, it's just that being an academic never stops. It comes home with you from the lab/school/conferences.

The next thing I would say that's important is listening and NOT give advice. I can't help Andrew if he's having a problem with an experiment or his analysis program, or marking assignments. I'm a librarian and know nothing more about superhydrophobic surfaces (surfaces that really, really repel water) than what he's told me. Often, Andrew just wants to talk out what's going on, and listening is the best thing I can do (although I do have enough scientific understanding that I can occasionally suggest something useful).

Listening and offering support/encouragement is also important, and often very tricky. Throughout much of Andrew's academic career, he's been very certain that he enjoys the teaching aspect, and is okay at the research aspect (I mean he's received a TON of scholarships, so he must be all right), but not quite sure if he really wants a full, tenured professor position. This has become an even more difficult problem since he's now applying for jobs and attending interviews. Sure, I want Andrew to have a job, but I don't want him to take one just because I WANT him to be a professor. I'll love him no matter what he does as a career, and it doesn't hurt to remind him of that every now and again.

What's really frustrating for me is when I'm left to fall back on cliched/stock comments, like "Everyone has to go through this [the feeling that his PhD work will never end/job hunting/interviews/doubts about being a professor]". Recently I basically resorted to saying "Suck it up, Princess," but sometimes I think that's necessary, too.

The last thing I'm going to suggest as important in caring for your academic, is having an understanding and flexibility around the demands of their workload. As I wrote above, academics take their work home with them almost every night, and frequently on the weekends, too. Luckily for Andrew, I usually write in the evening and need to be at my own computer, too, so it works for us. I would also point out that I'm not saying the non-academic spouse should be left to do all the housework/child care, but you may need to accept that your academic can't veg out on the couch with you all night, or go to a movie/shopping, or whatever else people do at night.

Ultimately, I'm extremely proud of Andrew. He's one smart cookie, and I can now say that I'm married to a doctor (even if he's not the kind that helps people).

Andrew J.B. Milne, PhD, in his full University of Alberta academic robes.

Ciao, Andrea