To NECCA I go: Teacher training workshop, part 0.5

I had something of a challenging start to my week of aerial teacher training.

The drive from Somerville, MA to Brattleboro, VT is only about 2 hours, but last night it took me…3.5, I think? There were 2 reasons for this: 1) the weather was kind of crappy, and I spent much of the time driving between 60 and 80 kph, even though I was on major highways where I should have been driving more like 100 kph or more; 2) I’m still not a pro at navigating the New England area, which meant that in the dark…well, it was awfully hard to read my directions. At least every time I made a wrong turn I realized it almost immediately and just had to wait for an opportunity to turn around.

Then I thought I lost my wallet. I stopped to get a snack on my way, since I was driving over dinner, and threw my wallet on the passenger seat when I got back into the car. Then, when I arrived at my accommodations, I was in a hurry to get out of the car and must of have knocked it over so it was wedged between the seat and the door. Later, growing panicked and very dark, when I went out to look for it I couldn’t see it, so I called Andrew to tell him I’d lost it. He was at a party, but agreed to cancel my American credit card for me, and we’d deal with the rest in the morning. Good thing we didn’t go all gung-ho and cancel everything, since I found it this morning, in the day light.

Now I’m just having some breakfast and gearing myself up for 5 days of socializing with people I don’t know. This is a pretty major challenge for someone who’s a Darcy-pants like me, especially when I don’t have Andrew, or other friends with me as backup.

Wish me luck.

Ciao,

Andrea

A conversation between me and Andrew, a la the Bloggess

I have a tendancy to build up muscle knots in my back. Sometimes they're small and don't bother me, but this morning when I woke up I had a big one around the edge of my right shoulder blade that was uncomfortable without moving my arms. It's in a weird spot and I can't effectively roll it, so I asked Andrew if he would massage it for a bit to ease the discomfort. Because he's a wonderful husband he obliged, and spent almost half an hour pressing on lumps in my back.

Then we had this conversation:

Andrew: You've got knots on knots.

Me: I know, I didn't think I over did it at the gym yesterday, except maybe for the bench press.

Andrew: This isn't from the gym. I can feel bits moving onto top of other bits that aren't muscle or bone.

Me: I guess I'm stressing out a bit.

Andrew: Just think about Hannibel Lecturn [sic], he's have to stew you for ages.

Me: That's a weird and disturbing reference, where did that come from?

Andrew: I don't know, it just came out. But think about how unpleasant you'd be.

Me: I guess I'd just be really gamey.

Andrew: I don't know, the knots are build ups of lactic acid, right? So you'd be meaty with these hard lumps in it. So think of Hannibel Lecturn [sic] think of that as an incentive to not build up knots.

Me: It's Lecter.

Andrew: Oh, sorry, Lecter.

Me: And wouldn't that be an incentive for me to build up knots?

Andrew: Yeah, maybe.

Then we laughed, and I wrote this blog post.

Ciao,

Andrea

Staycation 2014: Yes we did, and it worked pretty well

For some time Andrew and I felt that we were in desperate need of a vacation. I kept throwing out: "Why don't we go away for Christmas?" But Andrew wouldn't go for it. Personally, I have no problem with the idea of palm trees and no snow at Christmas time, but Andrew (probably rightly) felt we were better off to go home and visit family and friends.

At any rate, and as is often the case, when we got back from the holidays, the feeling of exhaustion only continued to mount (I never sleep, nor eat well when we stay at either of our parents homes). Eventually we agreed we had to take some kind of proper vacation, but we couldn't decide on what. Being a port city, lots of cruises go out of Boston, so that was one option. We could go for a packaged beach deal (something we've never done before), I was even toying with the idea of flying to England or Scotland for a week.

There was one teensy, weensy problem. Aerials classes. I know, we could have just missed a week, except I'm already going to miss a week when I go to NECCA mid-February, so that left us trying to cram something in between Thursday of one week to Tuesday of the next. That's not really enough for a relaxing vacation. After much discussion (and probably a lot of moaning from me) we decided we could do a staycation. Sleep in, visit museums, eat out or do take out, take things slow and do whatever we want, and I'd say for the most part, it worked.

I'm not going to give an in depth recounting of our activities. That would be long and boring for everyone, but I'll give a brief overview of what we saw and did. Most of the places we went didn't allow pictures, and the weather was generally cold, which isn't conducive to outdoor photography either. So...

Saturday, Salem: Phillips House, this was great, we pretty much got a personal tour (January isn't exactly the height of tourist season in Salem). In the afternoon we went to the Peabody Essex Museum and saw an interesting exhibit on Japanese Haute Culture.

Sunday, Normal Day: Sunday was aerials practice and class, which was standard order for Sunday.

Monday, Boston: We were going to go for breakfast at the Neighborhood Family Restaurant, it's very popular around here, but as it was actually a holiday in the US on Monday, there was a sizable line by the time we arrived. Instead we went to S&S Restaurant, in Inman Square. We spent the afternoon in the Museum of Science, which was pretty fun and we also went to the planetarium. I haven't been to a planetarium show in ages, and it was awesome (all about moons)!

Tuesday, Cambridge: Tuesday was MIT day. We took a tour of MIT, which was interesting, but not quite as historical as we might have liked. It was also pretty cold that day, so the outside bits were kind of uncomfortable. In the afternoon we went to the MIT museum. It had a collection of cool robots and interesting art exhibits.

Wednesday, Boston: We went to the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum, which is a super cool art museum, created by well,...Isabella Steward Gardner. She collected all kinds of art (wide ranges of ages, styles, etc), built a building to show her art, and arranged it as she wished (she was very rich).

Thursday, Our Apartment, and Boston: We were going to go to the Boston Symphony on Thursday, but we were getting kind of pooped out from the walking and appreciating culture by this point. Instead, Andrew slept in, while I watched the Lizzie Bennet Diaries and knit--he joined me once he got up (all told, we watched, roughly, episodes 35-100). Afterwards (around 2:30 pm) we went to the Museum of Fine Art, which was enormous. We saw maybe a quarter of the museum.

Friday, Cambridge: Friday was kind of wonky. I had an appointment at 12:30, which made it difficult to make plans. Instead we went shopping for the afternoon (and both got trench coats from Banana Republic--they were half price).

Saturday, Revere, Cambridge: We decided to go to a movie matinee to see Frozen. Probably due to my on going health questions (see previous post) I was extra emotional throughout, but I think we both really enjoyed the movie. In the evening we went to a beach themed party (and a got to whip out my trusty Hawaiian shirt from high school).

Sunday, Normal Day: The last day of our holiday, was pretty much a normal day, except we went for a big expensive dinner in the evening. Unfortunately, I ended up super sick to my stomach in the middle of the night, which was something of a damper.

I think our staycation was fairly successful. Andrew and I both felt pretty rested, and by Sunday we were both feeling that we were ready to get back to normal life.

Ciao,

Andrea

The one place we did take pictures was the Boston Museum of Science. This is kind of the 'back' window, looking out at the Charles River.

The front window, with a kind of nifty art installation, where the pink things actually changed colour.

Us playing around in the math discovery area. This one was looking at fractions and multiples, as each of the 3 chairs were replicas of each other, but different dimensions.

Tiny chair.

Big chair.

Amenorrhea--revisited, revisited

Quick update (since I live my life on the Internet): the round of birth control pills did not do what they were supposed to do, which was to force me to have a period (and no, I'm not pregnant). I realize that most women do not look forward to their 'monthly visitor,' but it's been so long (and I took the pills against my better judgement), so I was disappointed to not have a period. By around Wednesday of last week (when it was becoming pretty obvious that nothing was happening), I was getting worried.

Worried, but yet still very, er, calm?

In the back of my head, crazy thoughts started to pop up, like maybe my ovaries are full of cancer and that's why I haven't had a period in over a year and a half. Then the more rational part of my brain kicked in, and I would think, absolutely nothing else is wrong with me. I'm pretty sure if I'd had cancer manifesting in my reproductive system for the last eighteen months, something else would have shown (more extensive weight loss, pain, weird lumps, etc.). I am fine. Regardless, I was kind of on the emotional side on Wednesday, having unexpected tears a couple of times during the day.

On Friday I emailed my health care provider at MIT Medical to let her know about my lack of flow. She got back to me later on in the day, and her response gave me a great deal of relief. Although it seems to have been something of a surprise that the birth control pills didn't trigger a period, she also didn't seem alarmed (i.e., she didn't tell me I needed to come in immediately). I'm to do a couple of extra tests, an ultrasound, and more blood work, but this is just to make sure everything is indeed all right.

So, that's where I stand, or sit, or whatever. I'm most likely normal, and I'm just to carry on from here. Personally, I will try to eat more on a consistent basis (rather than making up for the lost calories during the weekend), and I'll continue to take a multivitamin to help me get the iron I don't get from my pseudo-vegetarian diet. I'll also assume that for now, I'm mostly normal, until proven otherwise.

Ciao,

Andrea

Caring for the academic in your life

The title of this post makes it sound like having an academic in your life is like having a pet, or a tank of sea monkeys. I promise, that even a challenging kitten like ours (who's always had a lively personality to say the least), is still easier than coping with, encouraging, and supporting someone looking for a profession in academia. I got the idea of putting together this post after having coffee with an acquaintance who also moved to the Boston area thanks to her spouse (he's only starting his PhD, so I found myself in the advice giving/experienced position).

A semi-recent PhD comic gives an not-so-inaccurate look into the life of the partner/spouse of an academic:

Andrew was still home when I read this comic (I think he was getting ready to leave), so I informed him that I was his academic groupie...which of course lead to some inappropriate conversation about whether or not I'd been living up to my "groupie duties."

Anyway...Andrew and I moved to Edmonton in order for him to complete his Masters (and then we stayed for his PhD), and we're now in Somerville for his post-doctoral research. Although we didn't make either of these moves without consultation, we probably wouldn't have lived in either place if it wasn't for him. As Andrew looks for a full-time job we're expecting to move once more, but again, it won't be without mutual agreement. I don't generally travel with Andrew when he goes to conferences as I usually have to work/I know I won't see him if I do come, but I've been left at home with the kitten on numerous occasions.

So, how does one care for the academic in your life? Well, to start, not unlike a pet, you make sure they have food, water, and shelter. I often joke that if Andrew and I weren't married, he'd be eating ramen noodles for most meals, and finding himself doing the "sniff test" every morning to help him figure what to wear. This isn't to say that Andrew's incapable of cooking or doing laundry, but he'd got experiments, analyses, papers, meetings, etc., that tend to take priority. He's not the "Absent Minded Professor" either, it's just that being an academic never stops. It comes home with you from the lab/school/conferences.

The next thing I would say that's important is listening and NOT give advice. I can't help Andrew if he's having a problem with an experiment or his analysis program, or marking assignments. I'm a librarian and know nothing more about superhydrophobic surfaces (surfaces that really, really repel water) than what he's told me. Often, Andrew just wants to talk out what's going on, and listening is the best thing I can do (although I do have enough scientific understanding that I can occasionally suggest something useful).

Listening and offering support/encouragement is also important, and often very tricky. Throughout much of Andrew's academic career, he's been very certain that he enjoys the teaching aspect, and is okay at the research aspect (I mean he's received a TON of scholarships, so he must be all right), but not quite sure if he really wants a full, tenured professor position. This has become an even more difficult problem since he's now applying for jobs and attending interviews. Sure, I want Andrew to have a job, but I don't want him to take one just because I WANT him to be a professor. I'll love him no matter what he does as a career, and it doesn't hurt to remind him of that every now and again.

What's really frustrating for me is when I'm left to fall back on cliched/stock comments, like "Everyone has to go through this [the feeling that his PhD work will never end/job hunting/interviews/doubts about being a professor]". Recently I basically resorted to saying "Suck it up, Princess," but sometimes I think that's necessary, too.

The last thing I'm going to suggest as important in caring for your academic, is having an understanding and flexibility around the demands of their workload. As I wrote above, academics take their work home with them almost every night, and frequently on the weekends, too. Luckily for Andrew, I usually write in the evening and need to be at my own computer, too, so it works for us. I would also point out that I'm not saying the non-academic spouse should be left to do all the housework/child care, but you may need to accept that your academic can't veg out on the couch with you all night, or go to a movie/shopping, or whatever else people do at night.

Ultimately, I'm extremely proud of Andrew. He's one smart cookie, and I can now say that I'm married to a doctor (even if he's not the kind that helps people).

Andrew J.B. Milne, PhD, in his full University of Alberta academic robes.

Ciao, Andrea

Amenorrhea--revisted

Remember how I wrote back in the late winter/early spring that I was experiencing post-pill amenorrhea? Well, I still haven't had a period. I've seen two more health care professionals at MIT Medical (both nurse practitioners, one of whom specializes in obstetrics), and I've now been told that what I'm experiencing is hypothelamic amenorrhea.

It's what I kind of thought the problem was, but couldn't quite believe was the problem because I'm not a super trim, high performance athlete. Basically, I'm too lean to support the process of menstruation. My BMI is fine, partially because I have a higher than average amount of muscle for a woman. I only exercise 8-9 hours a week, and spend most of the rest of my time sitting, but I guess that's enough to do it. More probably, of those 8-9 hours of exercise, I spend 2 hours lifting weights in the gym, and 2-3 hours lifting myself practicing aerials (hence why I'm rather muscular).

So, what's my treatment? I could cut down on exercise, or I could eat more. I know from tracking my diet for the last several years that I consumed between 2,100-2,300 calories/day, and on average have a balanced calorie intake/output every week. The other option was a chemical reminder to my brain and ovaries about what their supposed to do once a month.

Presently, I'm back on birth control pills. This isn't necessary because I wanted the quick and easy fix, but I want/needed the definite (or should be definite) fix. It's just for three weeks, which is what I have to continually remind myself. Three weeks only, and I've decided if it doesn't work, I will NOT be continuing on them no matter what. I've gained around 6 pounds in 2 weeks thanks to the pill. As Andrew repeatedly reminds me (and as I know myself, I really do), it's the pill that's caused this weight gain, and it's because my body is retaining water.

That doesn't help me feel better.

As I've blogged before, I was overweight as a child and teen, so any hint of gaining weight makes me worry. I hate that the weight gain has happened so quickly (2 weeks!) and it will probably take me a couple of months to get back to where I was before January. Except, given that my weight and body compilation seem to be the source of my problems, maybe I just need to accept that I need to be 5 or 8 pounds heavier to be healthy. That, my dear readers, if definitely more easily said than done.

I'm not going to delve into the issues of popular culture and female body image. Others have done, and will continue to do so better than I am capable of, but there are times when being a young-ish health-conscious woman sucks.

Ciao,

Andrea

A long slow return to blogging

I went blog-silent in December.

No particular reason, I just didn't have anything interesting, or note worthy to post about. Toward the end of the month, I did get my Individual Tax Identification Number (ITIN), which means that Nora is now up on Amazon. There are other spots on the Internet that provide a detailed explanation as to how to obtain an ITIN, but I might add my own two cents if nothing better to write about pops up.

I worked on a new story in December, a pure romance about the circus. It's mostly done, just half of the last chapter left to go, but now I'm a bit stumped as to what to do with it. Correction, last night I decided that my heroine, Beth, needed a better resolve, so it'll be another chapter or two before I'm done. I'd like to send it to Entangled Publishing (they expressed interest in Cimwai's Bay, but ultimately turned it down), but I'm not sure what line my story would best suit. It's about the aerialists and acrobats in a travelling circus. My character's a little too old for one category, I'm not sure if there are enough romance tropes in it for another, and there's no sex. There will probably be sex (Eep, I've never written more than a kiss before, so this shall be...interesting).

What's coming up for me in the new year? Not a whole lot. Andrew and I are still in something of a transitional stage, living in Somerville. Even if he get's a job offer (there are interviews coming up), we may opt to stay in the States until his postdoc funding is complete (it's good for two years). I'm still working remotely, which is fine for the most part, although it can get a bit lonely at times, especially right now while the days are short. I've started to volunteer with a food pantry organization nearby, which helps get me out once a week.

I'm also going back to NECCA in February for their Introduction to Teaching Aerials workshop and I hope to start helping at Esh Circus Arts as an assistant instructor for the next session. I'd once thought of becoming a figure skating coach (for kids), but since I stopped skating when I started aerials I gave that idea up. I'm still interested in coaching/teaching in some form, and since my focus has changed, I feel like being an aerial instructor might be a nice alternative. I'll report back after the Teaching workshop.

Currently we don't have any major travel plans beyond my driving to Vermont. We might go home to Ontario over Easter, but that will probably depend on how busy Andrew is with research stuff.

I hope everyone is warm and safe wherever they're reading this from. Somerville's been a real treat weather-wise. We were +10 Celsius yesterday when much of Canada was disgustingly cold, and even though today was on the negative half of the thermometer, at least it was sunny.

Ciao,

Andrea