Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Character flaws: It's not you, it's totally me, Part 5

I'm a worrier.

Big time.

I worry about everything. About being late, about why other people (mainly Andrew) are late, how I'm perceived, how my actions are perceived, where the next phase of our life is going to take us, and once we get there will we like it, etc., etc.

And I know, worrying doesn't accomplish anything, except perhaps to make me more exhausted, but there it is.

So, what am I supposed to do about this? Does my recurrent theme of practicing help here? I suppose on some levels if I practice greater patience, I might worry less about punctuality. Also, if I practice making conversations with people and being friendlier, I might be less apt to worry about how others perceive me. Or I might instead worry about whether or not what I said in my efforts to be conversational came across as stupid or haughty.

It would seem that many of my faults are intertwined with one another. Perhaps this has always painfully obvious to everyone else (not necessarily that only my faults are interrelated, rather that everyone's are), but it's only now becoming apparent to me.

Let me be clear as I'm approaching the end of my Character Flaws posts, I'm not trying to make myself a perfect (LeeLoo Dallas-type) being. I'm only trying to recognize where I have room for improvement. With the possibility of children looming closer on our horizon, I would like to present the best person I can be to them, rather than a grouchy, bitchy woman, who's dissatisfied with her life choices.

If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it's not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever.
~Dalai Lama XIV


No comments: